december

so, here we go again. as spm was over almost a month ago, and now, I'm totally free from school, more accurately,
school uniform. I'd free from all the bitches in my class that used me as a toy. controlled all over my life.
who da fuck do you think who you are? get a life!

as Puan Haslina used to tell my class that, stop dreaming, focused on SPM, bla bla and etc, and she said
"lepas spm, kamu buat la apa yang kamu nak buat, pecaya la cakap saya, sampai satu hari nanti kamu tak tau nak
buat apa, duduk atas katil, mengadap syiling tiga hari tiga malam, kamu mesti bosan punya!"

so yeah, she is exactly right! definitely !

here we go my routine this month
struggle to wake up in the morning, breakfast at 11 am, tv, lunch, tv, twitter, tv, dinner, sleep

see, nothing, something that would make my muscle increase maybe?

novel,
yeah, so, my brother and I used to have couple of novels, kinda interesting.
But, after SPM, all the novels were gone ! disappeared in a blink of an eye.
even, until now, I'm still looking for it.

my brain

what happened to my brain recently. I don't think so my brain think the right thing to do.
my mum seemed to 'jerk' at me.
I wonder what is my fault.
I am already an adult. almost 18. exactly 18 !

my life
my life is boring as slut on her period
I don't know what to do
I don't do my laundry, yeah. who cares. eh, joke meh!
I don't know and I could not imagine life without internet, the only way to entertainment maybe?
I wonder, should I fall in love again? again?
as sweet as Ronnie and Will in The last song novel?
yeah, I admit that Will's body is juicy-sweet-sexy body. yeah. no lie.
I just don't wanna get involve in l-o-v-e again. nope.

yeahhhhhhhh, being single. another problem.
envy. nope. I'd never envy with any couples.
I don't think so they are perfect. trust me, nowadays relationship won't last for years.
they couldn't resist any barrier together. that is their weakness.
I just learned from the past. and I don't wanna get into trouble again.
to forget your ex, it may takes a year!

phewww.

ahhh, I need money then, to survive !
as previous years, my income came by school money which is from my parents. the only source.
and now, when school is over, no money, no income.
yeah, bullshit.
I have only couple of bucks which is from my grandma. every time we visited her, she will give me some
pocket money, quite enough to top-up my credit phone buy some snacks, maybe..

so, I need a job ! what? I am seventeen. deal !
of coz, all the seventeen are eagerly looking for a job too.
mall, boutique, station gas, restaurant and what else? public bathroom cashier?
hmmmmmmmmmm.
for god sake, I need a job.
I'd thinking kinda job that I like such as working at bookstore, somehow, I can sneak by reading some books.
man, that works might the most relax and easy in the world. even I have surveyed some bookstore in my city.
the workes are relaxing and smiling like an idiot. see, easy huh?
but, until now, I don't have any job yet, yet, yet.......
poor me.
my parents are not-so-supportive.
moreover, I don't have any legal license of driving too which is quite dangerous to go to work.

yeah, today, dad has registered me up for driving license. but, I am not quite satisfied.
I want a driving license for car and motorcycle. but dad, he said " buat motor la dulu"
poor me.

my face
what the heck is happening at my face
fucking spicy black spot which is next to my mouth
it looks ugly ! fuck ! retard !
so, yeah I went to clinic, and the doctor said it might be because of my dry skin.
DRY SKIN ! yeah, in December, I have been travel to many places and beaches.
beach.
ocean.
hot.
that is.
Kuala Terennganu, Kerteh, Kelantan, Lumut, Batu Ferringi, and unknown beach, Pulau batik.
fuck !
and
how to vanish it away. impossible of coz. I am so worried. I afraid it wont be okay for ever.
I feel like, I wanna use CLOROX. yeah. maybe.
so, I do have plan. whenever people ask it, I will say " accident. wildest accident"
easy huh?
and it's pain too. because it's so itchy, so, I GARU hardly la.

21 December 2012
so, nothing happened huh? see. perabih duit ja beli cd 2012. haram jadah lah.
so, that day, I was in Lumut. as in 20 December 2012, I thought that I'm gonna watch the last sunset in my life.
yeah, enjoying like a dude. fuck haha !
I don't believe it either. I just..

PLKN
yeah, PLKN. luckily. I have chosen to be in kumpulan 2/3
which is kumpulan 1 will depart on 3 January 2013, Thursday. bye Izzati latif, gonna miss you

Traveling
yeah. being a backpacker, that is. what I really want. travel. wild. fly. homeless.
who cares, as long as you can see beautiful world. as long as you have passion.
I am. before SPM, I'd planned to go to KL and yeah, perambulate with my cousin. but, as lovely-rosely daughter,
are you guys think my mum gonna allow me, hell no.
prison.

ah, run out of idea already.
3 months to go. phewww

oh yeah, these days, I keep dreamed about SPM. fuck. it haunted me. i mean, the question that I have answered.
damn it !
I just wanna relax and tawakal maybe?